Showing posts with label barefoot technology. Show all posts
Showing posts with label barefoot technology. Show all posts

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Everywhere we go-o people wanna know-o


Where did your husband get those butt ugly shoes?

Yes, those are shoes. They're called Fivefingers and they're part of a new trend called "barefooting." All the cool kids are doing it.

Vibram, one of the companies that makes them (in addition to dog boots and dog toys that look a lot like their shoes), claims "Like the rest of the body, to keep our feet healthy, they need to be stimulated and exercised."

Gah! Some days I don't have time to poo, never mind worry that my damn feet are stimulated.

Chuck loves—loves—his gloved feet. Personally, I think they make him look like a cross between a monkey and robo-man. Every time I see them I start humming Mr. Roboto. And yuck, having each of my toes separated like fingers in a glove would drive me nuts. What if one of your toes is grossly enlarged? What if you step on a sharp rock? Or in a mound of snow?

Or have webbed feet? (Sorry, no shoes for you.)

Having said all that, there is one amazing detail to these shoes that prevents me from "misplacing" them: They are machine washable.

Goodbye, Odor Eaters. Hello, um, apemanthing.



What about you? Do you, like, barefoot?

I won't let that Halloween go! I won't, I tell you.

After years of dying a slow professional death at Mulletville Corp and then resurrecting my career through a series of part-time, freelance,...