Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Shield yourself: It's all coming out

I beg to differ with WYM: Bodily functions are NOT fun. They are not fun at home and they are certainly not fun when you take Junior to the grocery store to buy Tylenol and he upchucks on his slippery winter coat and starts sliding down your slippery winter coat and the two of you look and smell like alleyway rats trying to engulf each other in a horribly awkward embrace.

Yes, no sooner had I finished writing about Junior's Raisinets® woes than he decided to give us the gift of every bodily function possible, along with a fever. But you have your own kids; you certainly don’t need the grimy details of mine.

I want to tackle a tag I got a bit ago from TAWM. I feel kind of Marcia Marcia for doing it, but I kind of still smell like puke, so indulge me?

I’m bored with the generic seven things so I’m changing the tag. Ready for my rebel roar? Here are the 7 important things I’ve learned because of blogging:

1. I don’t have to have a vagina to be a good writer (scroll past the creepy photo to BS Sunday).

2. People are in need this holiday season. This mother needs underwear.

3. I should never call myself a bad mom because this person has already claimed the title.

4. Mom fashion is regionally elitist. You’re only a cool mom in your bunny boots if you live here.

5. I should be a better person.

6. Dads are people, too. Lovable, in fact.

7. Stuffing your pants full of weed, cigarettes, crack pipes, and condoms will get you in trouble.

If you think some of those are strange, check out this woman who sports a monkey in her spare time. (Yeh, that's shameless self promotion but I told you I was having a Marcia Marcia moment, didn't I?)


Marinka said...

You know, you warned me, and yet I wasn't prepared. Thanks for the links, I can't wait to read them! LOL @ Marcia, Marcia, Marcia!

Keely said...

Holy linkness batman. Oh well, I don't have anything better to do...well, I *could* clean my house but...look at all the places you told me to visit!

Petra a.k.a The Wise (*Young*) Mommy said...

HAHAHAHAHA. Thanks for the linky love, even though you were disagreeing with my idea of humor.

I am SO sorry to hear about the puking at the supermarket incident. That is not funny at all.

(and I swear I am not really laughing)

Small Town Mommy said...

I was really looking forward to the photo of you with the monkey on your head. Alas, there was no photo to be seen.

Frogs in my formula said...

I'm saving the monkey shot for next Wed. I swear.

Keely said...

"Monkey shot"? Isn't that a porn industry term?

...I gave you an award, cause you rawk. Come by & get it. Bring beer.

thedavies99 said...

dads are the best. I should know, I am one. I bet you look cute in bunny shoes.

Carol said...

Bless your heart. I hope you got the kid puke off of everything and that the kid's not puking anymore.

Am off to check out some of these links, now.

Nicole said...

Your blog is seriously funny! There's a Smile Award for you on my blog :) Happy Thursday!

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