Sunday, July 19, 2009

They asked me again and again...and again...and again...



Dear Chuck's friend's girlfriend's breasts,

I want to thank you so much for coming to Junior's birthday party on Saturday. It was a pleasure to meet you...in your entirety. It was so cute how Chuck's friend kept slipping up and saying, "She's my girls." Oops.

I must admit, you threw me for quite a loop. When people came up to me again and again and asked, "Did you see them?" I thought they were referring to the Cookie Monster cupcakes I so lovingly baked and decorated for my son.



Their wide-eyed shock seemed appropriate given my track record with baking. I mean, let's be honest, everything I make usually comes out like shit. It would make sense that they would see the cupcakes and think the cupcake fairy made them, and not me. Alas, they were talking about you.

I also had no idea that so many of my friends and family enjoyed deviled eggs. I'm sure it had nothing to do with the fact that you doled them out while leaning forward. I'm sure if I had offered people a plate of creamy eggs that had been sitting in the sun for two hours I would have had eager takers as well. Wink, wink.

Thanks again for coming. It was the breast—I mean best—toddler birthday party ever.

Fondly,
Mrs. Mullet

42 comments:

Kayleen said...

Ugh... I'm personally much more interested in those cookie monster cupcakes- adorable!

You know its bad when you just cant look away... like an accident on the road... but with nipples.

Harmony said...

Sounds like a good time :)

Ashlee said...

Might be just me but I'll def take a cute cookie monster cookie over a tig ole bitty any day of the week :)!

Stacie said...

Those are awesome Cookie Monster cupcakes that you made. Very creative.

Well damn, that sucks that she had to bring her "girls" in all their glory to a child's birthday.

blognut said...

Awfully nice of her to bring 'the girls' out at Junior's party!

Also, it was extremely cool of you to make cupcakes that look just like a blognut. Way cool! I may steal the photo - 'cause it was all about me, right?

Suzi said...

Hahahaha, did you take a picture of her girls or is that from the internet? That would have made the deal to sneak a picture.....after all everyone else was sneaking a peak. Hahahahah, you'll laugh about this 15 years from now.

Great cupcakes by the way! Those are way too cute. Happy birthday Junior! It's probably the most boob you'll never appreciate in a long time. ;-)

Ashley said...

I'm pretty sure that those are my boobs you have a picture of. And in defense of all big titted women everywhere (the natural kind) its almost impossible to wear anything other than a v-neck and not look like a malformed freak. So yeah, I wear my girls out most of the time, and they do get stared at, but as this point in my life I don't care.

Look at it this way, at least she got the deviled eggs taken care of instead of leaving you with leftovers.

Kate said...

So were those Junior's birthday present from her or what?

Mad Woman said...

Those are some pretty yummy looking cups. Err..sorry....cupcakes!

Holy bazookas!

Roshni Mitra Chintalapati said...

Those look amazing...of course, I mean the cupcakes!! How did you make them?! I feel humbled...again, I am talking about the cupcakes!!
Happy birthday to junior!!! He must be proud to have you as a mommy!!

mo.stoneskin said...

Did she let you take the photo, or was that a shot from a hidden camera fixed to your sunglasses?

Julia@SometimesLucid said...

Those cookie monster cupcakes are adorable! And I have to know - how did you get the camera so close to her breasts ;)

the ungourmet said...

There was a girl in line behind my son and I in Target a couple of days ago that looked just like this. Maybe it was her!

I couldn't even look her way because I knew I would not be able to not look at her breasts falling out. She was obviously very proud of them.

Halala Mama said...

Oh. My. Goodness.

But the cupcakes are fabulous. :)

Angel said...

I love those cupcakes! Too Cute! I guess she didn't have time to stop and get a present so she brought them! How ever did you get that picture??

Lindy said...

Bodacious!

Am I the only one helping you bring the word back? That was the word, right?

Nice cupcakes - totally referring to the cookie monster ones.

Frogs in my formula said...

I can't lie--those are not her boobs. I have several pictures of them but none that did them justice.

Blognut, you were the inspiration of course!

Lindy, bodacious is right!

marybt said...

Those cupcakes are darling!

As the straightest woman in America, I must pretend I didn't see the other.

Brandy said...

oh wow. ya. hmmm... My husband's 18 yr cousin came to thanksgiving dinner like that. I swear "they" were staring at me.

Brandy said...

in front of her 80 yr old grandpa. I'm just sayin

Emily said...

I'm rolling here! I mean, is are those the actual picture? Please tell me someone had the absence of mind to take their pictures!!!

Unbelievable. Sister, put those bad boys away!

Shana said...

Oh my gosh those cupcakes are adorable!!

Keely said...

I'm surprised she didn't have some of the younger children following her around looking for a free meal...

FoN said...

What is with that? My husband has a friend with that girl friend too. We all just refer to her as Tits-Hanging-Out. Kind of like her Dances With Wolfs name.

Sheila said...

HOLY MOLY are those real? Or can you read the serial numbers off of them? WOWZERS!!!!
LOVE the cupcakes though! GOOD JOB!

Mrs. C. said...

Well. Um. Were the actual boobs even more overwhelming than the photo you used? Because those made me want to call my mom and ask her to tell me the story again about why having a good personality and character was much more important than how you fill out a sweater. (I heard that story a lot as a teenager.)

But those cupcakes rock! They look like the ones we pay $.99 each for at the bakery here and surely tasted WAY better.

Dorothy L said...

LOL...typically funny:)

C.B. Jones said...

Dear Chuck's friend's girlfriend's breasts,

I love you.


Om nom nom,
C.B. Jones

Shelli (wishes she was) Mrs. Burchett;) said...

that's like my kid's grandma coming to their bday parties in a mini-skirt and black fish-net tights. Or, the teenage cousins who insist on having their thongs hang out at Thanksgiving @ their grandparents house with nothing but relatives there....ick

Anne said...

Wow, that was a shocker when I arrived here. I certainly wasn't expecting that photo. Now, onto the important stuff, the cupcakes. They looks absolutely awesome! You did an amazing job.

lizspin said...

Yeah, I like the Blognut cupcakes better than the melons. . .

The Mother said...

I love those cupcakes! The ones you baked, I mean.

Vodka Mom said...

oh SNAP! That made me LAUGH OUT LOUD.


and I did NOT look at the twice. or three times.

Stacy (the Random Cool Chick) said...

I was a bit blinded by the picture and had to strain to focus on your words... ;) Luckily hubby's already gone into the house - don't want to have to deal with any drool clean up. ;)

Pricilla said...

At least junior didn't ask her to get naked.....

Dto3 said...

I would have eaten a deviled egg!

Julia said...

Well, I guess some anatomy class requirements have been filled by those teats. I'm surprised she did not whip one out and ask if somebody need to nurse their kid.

Sara said...

This reminds me of that commercial...the amount of leverage a woman has is equal to her cleveage.

Adorable cupcakes!

Stacie's Madness said...

roflmao.

there's a time and place to show the girls, a toddler's birthday is NOT the place, especially when there are fabulous cupcakes!

Mrsbear said...

Cupcakes and deviled eggs?! Why wasn't I invited?

I'm guessing you didn't specify G rated on the invite.

Nessa said...

I'm dying laughing here. You're so nice. I would have asked her if she considered clothing at a toddlers party an option. Sheesh!

Nessa said...

Oh and the cupcakes are adorable!

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