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ABOUT ME

About me: I'm a 40-something mother to a pickle party of a family. My husband Chuck, our tween Junior, our 6-year-old Everett, our toddler Cam, and I live in a town in Connecticut I affectionately call Mulletville Lite (aka my childhood hometown). My friends call me Nutjob, and they're right. In my husband's spare time he dresses up as a Viking and chases ghosts (and I'm the nutjob?). I'm a freelance graphic designer and writer.

Saturday, May 30, 2009

Can I call myself chopalicious? I mean, can I really pull it off?

Chuck and I took Junior to Olde Mistick Village today to feed the ducks (that's really all you can afford to do there since two ice cream cones cost $8). Here's the obligatory cute kid picture:



And here's Mrs. Mullet and her...her...chops? Screeech! What?!



Let's zoom in for a closer look, shall we?



Yes, I have a hair forest growing near my ear. Do I shave it? Braid it? What exactly is the "in" thing to do with female chops nowadays? Maybe I can weave my chops into the top of my handlebar mustache. I mean, why not?

Chuck assured me it was just the shadow and that the next picture would come out better.



Mmmyah, not so much. Clearly, it was hopeless. So Chuck decided to take pictures of a faceless Mrs. Mullet and her favorite kitty instead:



In case you can't tell, our cat is ginormous. He's half the length of Chuck:



Chuck wants you to know that he definitely was not grabbing the cat by his nuts. The cat doesn't have his nuts anymore.

(If all this talk of hair sprawl and fat cats has you craving sand, I’m giving away one Naturally Playful sandbox. All you have to do is leave me a comment on the post below).

28 comments:

Gina said...

Holy crap - the giant cat totally distracted me from the chops. I may possibly be in love with Catzilla.

Kate said...

I think you should grow Elvis chops--he was always so sexy!

I think we have squirrels here as large as your cat. We let our (big) dogs out back and the squirrels don't even scatter. They do have their balls!

I really, really want the sandbox (ya know, for the squirrels to play in) but didn't specify that in my previous comment. I also didn't want to break the rules and leave another comment. Good grief, I'm rambling now....past my bedtime....pregnant lady need sleep...

Roshni Mitra Chintalapati said...

that cat seems to know yoga!!

Keely said...

Um...it's an...INTERESTING look for a woman, at any rate.

But yeah, your chop angst was overshadowed by the cat that is so large it requires hefting by its crotch. Does that thing just do whatever it damn well pleases??

Julia said...

That cat would totally whoop Shmobies ass to your coast and back again. You were not even kidding about him I see. When he sleeps on the bed is capable of tying down half of the blankets isn't he! What the heck do you feed him or does he just open the fridge himself and gorge on Brie and pate? Holy Shit that is a big cat.

Julia said...

Also he totally stole the show from your chops.

Yaya said...

Lol!!!!!

Jeanne said...

I'm scared of your cat.

kyooty said...

oh and there is photographic proof, you've been Mulletized! :) I thought we had a fat cat but I think you win that contest, cause you know all this mom stuff is one big contest right?

Suzi said...

My first thought was that Chuck was grabbing the cat by the balls. He is quite the large kitty!

Let the chops grow to the length of the rest of your hair, they will blend in.

Jennifer said...

that is the biggest friggin cat ever!! and he looks totally pissed off, but wouldn't you be to if someone was grabbing your not nuts? LOL.. Try dying your chops purple or something...

Mary@Holy Mackerel said...

He is too grabbing the cat's crotch. There's no denying that picture. Nuts or no nuts...

Marinka said...

Poor, victimized, ball-less cat

Pablo Guero said...

Nice chops. That takes confidence -- for a man or woman. I applaud you.

If Chuck wasn't grabbing the cat's nuts, then he must've been grabbing something else down there. Get him in therapy, now.

Mad Woman said...

Holy bananas that's a huge freakin' cat!! I think my neighbour has a dog that size...or maybe a kid.

Shelli (wishes she was) Mrs. Burchett;) said...

Pick me for the sandbox, and I'll wax your mutton chops for free;)

Mrsbear said...

Based on the chops and your silky tresses, you are one handsome woman. And your cat could eat a baby, he's gigantic.

Dto3 said...

Back in college when the then girlfriend, now loving wife and I couldn't afford anything, except beer, she had me "color" her hair. I actually created chops that were solid grey. Apparently, I focused a little too much on the side of her head where the hair is finest. Yep, she spent some bucks at the salon after that one.

Lindy said...

I didn't know there was a term for that....chops?!?!

K.H. Ohio said...

Now THAT'S a CAT. MONGO! And the fur!

(And if you figure out what to do with your chops let me know, I have some nice ones of my very own. Icky.)

GreenJello said...

That's not a cat. It's a miniature horse or something that he's grabbing by the crotch.

I hate it when you have those stupid little hairs that grow where you don't want them. Time for the razor!

Otter Thomas said...

Your chops are better than mine. Congrats! The cat however is a scary beast. It looks like something I saw chasing wildabeasts on the discovery channle this weekend.

Pricilla said...

The publicist had a cat that big once. It weighed 22lbs and was all black.

C.B. Jones said...

Grabbing a feline in the area that used to house his bits and pieces, not cool! Removing the bits and pieces of such a magnificently huge creature is also not cool.


Cut the side burns off, and tape it to the cats face as a beard and mustache combination.

Magpie said...

That might be the biggest cat IN THE WORLD.

ModernMommy said...

The sand box looks like something my daughter would love and it would actually fit in our tiny backyard.

Stacy (the Random Cool Chick) said...

OMG that is one HUGE cat! How cool is that?!

Wait...did you say something about chops? Are you making pork chops for dinner? ;)

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