Anthropologie made Christmas shopping so easy this year. As soon as their catalog arrived, I knew just what I wanted.
See, stores like Anthropologie really get average women like myself. They understand I don't want to see their products modeled on underfed beauties. Psshaw. That doesn't help me envision myself wearing it. No, I want to see their products on...
...farm animals!
Take this scarf. I love how it curls behind those big floppy pig's ears. Really elongates the face. I just wish I knew if it came with free grain or not.
And these necklaces? What better way to showcase them than on a smelly creature whose neck resembles an ultra hairy forearm? So regal. I must have them!
And the boots! So slimming. So chique. Seeing the leather against all that shearling helped me realize I could pull off my shearling jumpsuit + cowboy boots look for the holidays. I'll be the talk of the ball.
Thank you, Anthropologie!
P.S. Hasn't Anthropologie's Creative Director ever heard the sheep joke? You know the one...Why do sheep farmers wear rubber boots? (So they can stick a sheep's back legs into them. Prevents them from running away while they're getting screwed...)
P.P.S. Anthropologie did not pay me to write this post. Obviously.
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11 comments:
Thank you for the sheep joke.
The whole time I was reading this post I was thinking WTF to myself so I leave you with my comment: W.T.F.
I don't get that catalog ... Did you make this up or are you serious?
Yeah, because we all want to wear what the pigs are wearing down on the farm. Brilliant. Give that creative director a raise! A whole silo full. What the heck, throw in a few bales of hay and it'll be his Christmas bonus too!
[You're not making this up, right? Because, ugh...]
I don't think we have this store up here. I think I'm glad.
No GOAT?! I would have modeled. I am a beautiful goat. I am!
Baaaa......
Yep. That'll turn you off scarves, necklaces AND models.
Talk of the ball? Wow....in all these years, I have never heard them talk. My johnson does think for me, however.
Sadly, I'll take that over the usual waifs and ridiculous hair/makeup.
I'm with Keely. I'd so rather see how it looks on a pig, it's more like my measurements than their usual models.
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