Monday, December 1, 2008

Junior, Junior, let down your hair. Your frog prince is here to refill your Windex.

Do you hear someone shouting from the rooftops? It’s me.


Look! There’s a little boy vacuuming.

He’s playing with the iPlay® Home Vacuum Cleaner. And the vacuum is blue. Not hussy Barbie pink.

I found this progressive lad when the Young Explorers catalog was accidentally delivered to my doorstep. I’m happy (enough to take a picture, obviously) but

The copy says the vacuum sounds just like “mom’s upright.”

Come on. Young Explorers, I was willing to have your love child until I read that. (I still might be convinced, but it would take a lot of heavy petting.)

At least it's better than the Rose Petal Cottage Playhouse by Playskool.

Do you see what it says? Here, I'll read it to you:

“Every girl needs space to call her own…”

Is that supposed to be some kind of demented spin-off of Virginia Woolf’s A Room of One's Own? I really hope not. Because I believe Woolf was referring to the need for women to have a space of their own for self-expression, exploration and growth. Not—I repeat, not—for folding socks or baking muffins.

You rat bastards.

The fabulous marketing copy continues: “…and this fabric-covered playhouse gives little imaginations a place to roam free…and help little homemakers feel right at home. [You can even] slide the halves together to form a one-room dwelling!”

How fabulous! Nothing like instilling in your daughter a sense of domestic strangulation.

Mommy, Mommy, the walls are caving in and I haven’t added the fabric softener.

Playskool can bite me. They make Motrin look like Gloria Steinem.

Wanna guess what Junior's getting for Christmas? One Rose Petal Cottage Playhouse please.


Keely said...

Bwahhahhah! Oh my. They keep plugging that fucking Rose Petal Cottage on YTV when X is trying to watch Sesame Street and I want to drown myself in my coffee every time. Is it just me or is it WORSE than the supposedly 'unenlightened' years of our youth?

Nicole said...

Makes the Easy Bake Meth Lab look less tragic! Funny post... :)

harrietv said...

When my angels were of that non-questioning age, we saw a lot of tv. And when something came up that was gender-specific, I would say, for example, "Isn't that silly? Who fixes your toys?" And the answer would come back: "Mommy does!"

Lidian said...

Yeah, we've really come a long way since the 70s women's movement. Not.

Temple said... neighbor had a little kitchen set...we used the oven to store our slingshot ammo for surprise guerilla attacks on the boys. Mooohaaahaaahaaa!

Petra a.k.a The Wise (*Young*) Mommy said...

A one room dwelling? Seriously? Not only are they pigeonholing our daughters as nothing better than cleaning, cooking baby factories but they can't even set their sights as high as a two story Cape or at least a Ranch? Come on...

Frogs in my formula said...

Temple, I think am in love with you.

Dto3 said...

Did you not get that Barbie Playhouse for Christmas when you were 6?

Marinka said...

I love this post. It's a real pet peeve of mine how young gender role stereotyping starts. And by "pet peeve", I mean "rage".

Mary Anna said...

Those rat marketing bastards! (As a former one, I can sling it!)

We have a very gender-neutral kitchen set for our boys, which we purchased from Magic Cabin ( We've added stuff from Melissa and Doug and Target.

I took Thing 2 to one of those indoor play areas for toddlers recently and he played with the vacuum, the broom, the house and the kitchen. Now if only I can get him to play with the real stuff at home!

Felicia said...

LOL! Graham is getting a shopping cart for Christmas!

Smart A$$ Mom said...

BWAHAHAH. That reminds me back when I was peddling Pampered Chef and I offered up a bridal shower party and the bride to be said "Nothing says lovin' like Get Your Ass In The Kitchen!"

I say give him a barbie and GI Joe and see who survives childhood.

Michelle Gartner said...

Or you can get it for girls and they can learn how to have a popular cooking show and be rich and nasty mean to the show staff... gender specific toys really don't bother me. Most kids don't play with toys in the "approved" way...

I have to admit though this year Charlie Browns Christmas tree bothered me- (the show was about getting away commercialism and you want me to buy an overpriced Charlie Brown tree???) oh and the gas pump toy... what does that teach kids???

Thanks for stopping by I can be found here
One of a Kind Wisconsin.

Can I make a suggestion- go to your comment settings and open it to name and url too. That way bloggers who don't have blogspot blogs can comment on your site-

Frogs in my formula said...

Thanks Michelle!

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