About me: I'm 42 and added another gherkin to our pickle party of a family. My husband Chuck, our 9-year-old Junior, our 6-year-old Everett, our toddler and I live in a town in Connecticut I affectionately call Mulletville Lite (aka my childhood hometown). My friends call me Nutjob, and they're right. In my husband's spare time he dresses up as a Viking and chases ghosts (and I'm the nutjob?). When I'm not busy working as a graphic designer, I lie in a ball in the corner.
Wednesday, September 29, 2010
Everywhere we go-o people wanna know-o
Where did your husband get those butt ugly shoes?
Yes, those are shoes. They're called Fivefingers and they're part of a new trend called "barefooting." All the cool kids are doing it.
Vibram, one of the companies that makes them (in addition to dog boots and dog toys that look a lot like their shoes), claims "Like the rest of the body, to keep our feet healthy, they need to be stimulated and exercised."
Gah! Some days I don't have time to poo, never mind worry that my damn feet are stimulated.
Chuck loves—loves—his gloved feet. Personally, I think they make him look like a cross between a monkey and robo-man. Every time I see them I start humming Mr. Roboto. And yuck, having each of my toes separated like fingers in a glove would drive me nuts. What if one of your toes is grossly enlarged? What if you step on a sharp rock? Or in a mound of snow?
Or have webbed feet? (Sorry, no shoes for you.)
Having said all that, there is one amazing detail to these shoes that prevents me from "misplacing" them: They are machine washable.
Goodbye, Odor Eaters. Hello, um, apemanthing.
What about you? Do you, like, barefoot?