ABOUT ME

About me: I'm 40 and added another gherkin to our pickle party of a family. My husband Chuck, our 8-year-old Junior, our 5-year-old Everett, our baby and I live in a town in Connecticut I affectionately call Mulletville Lite (aka my childhood hometown). My friends call me Nutjob, and they're right. In my husband's spare time he dresses up as a Viking and chases ghosts (and I'm the nutjob?). When I'm not busy working as a graphic designer, I lie in a ball in the corner.

Friday, August 27, 2010

If I wasn't so addicted I could end the odoriferous cycle

Every morning I slather this on my pregnant mound:



And every morning I feel like I've taken a big whiff of these:



Cocoa butter formula my ass. They're using old toes and slippers, I tell ya! Surgical stockings and BENGAY! Bunions and oatmeal!

Tell everyone you know! Tell your neighbors and your postman!

Tell...your granny.

12 comments:

Heather said...

LMAO, found out I was knocked up recently and my knockers are well you know. This was on my walmart list for this weekend. haha bring on the senior feetsies.

Sara said...

The Body Shop has a line called Body Butter. I used it instead and it worked amazing. Smelled amazing too. Never did like that pregnancy cream stuff...how it smelled, how it went on, how it dried. Order some Body Butter in Shea, Coconut, Lemon...Any of them, all of them. :D They are all pretty amazing.

Mammatalk said...

There's better stuff out there. Go cruics the WHole Foods beauty aisle. I used some cocnut oil and pure shea nut butter. Kinda greasy, but, hey, it's better than stretch marks. And, I don't have any after two babies...

Mama Badger said...

I didn't think it smelled that bad. Then again, I was snot filled during my whole pregnancy.

And I agree with Sara, I used the Body Shop's Avocado butter and it was wonderful.

SLColman said...

LOL really?

Jen said...

I never used the stuff. My stretch marks are kinda like my own personal tattoos. They have faded nicely over time and you really can't see them very well. If I had thought of using it and it smelled like old people I would have chosen the stretch marks.

Lori said...

You had to go and bring it up. For the last five years I've been trying to block out what my "Granny" told me...

Apparently Palmers or at least cocoa butter remedies have been around for awhile and when I was pregnant with my daughter my Grandma bought me a bottle. She informed me that not only would it work, it would make you smell like a candy bar and when your husband got home, he'd "tell you to put the kids to bed and then you'd be walking funny in the morning". Yep, that's my grandma.

Lisa said...

Couldn't agree more about the smell. It's such a scam...I mean, you say "cocoa butter" and I'm thinking something coconutty and suntan lotion-y...LIARS.

anattitudeadjustment.com said...

I used the cocoa butter, too, and it was really strange. It turned my husband off. Which, come to think of it, was a good thing. I may need to buy some more....

Frogs in my formula said...

Sara, thanks for the recommendation.

Lori, that's too funny!

C.B. Jones said...

Nah! I'll be telling no one within a five mile radius about this shocking revelation.

Last time I ran around yelling something about oatmeal, I ended up being forced into therapy for a six month period.

That's why I like to keep my love for hot, wholesome breakfast food to my lonesome.

Keely said...

OMG, that stuff reeks.