Junior now sleeps in a large Tupperware container

I fully admit to being a girly products whore. I own about 55 tubes of lipstick (Mac Lipglass smells like Marshmallow Fluff and doesn't dry your lips out) and have tried every moisturizer out there (if you need a thicker moisturizer for winter that’s not greasy, try L’Occitane’s Immortelle Precious Cream—I know it sounds pretentious, but you’ll never have a dry patch again).

When Chuck and I first started dating, he mocked my grab bag of lotions and potions but cluck, cluck, guess who does a little spa day once a week with moi’s products? Yup, his favorites are The Body Shop’s Tea Tree mask and Benefit’s face scrub. (Don’t bother trying their eye cream; it’s crap.)

I could go on and on but I won’t, I promise. Foofy products aren’t the point of this post, it’s something much, much more exciting (just one more plug: Fresh's Cannibas Santal line smells so good people will change seats at a party just to sit next to you).

The point of this post is…Tupperware.

(Do you need a minute? Was that good for you?)

Ordinarily I wouldn’t give Tupperware a second thought but since I’ve gone back to work I now own enough Tupperware to open my own store.

I think word has gotten out that I am not a good cook (actually, I’m not that bad, I’m just a wee $%#&ing pressed for time) so people like my mother, mother-in-law, nanny, friends, and co-workers have started just giving me food. Like, our friend Des made sauce one night and just happened to make us four extra containers. And my co-worker made linguine last week with tomatoes and basil and randomly sent me home from work with a tub.

It’s awfully nice of everyone but the last time I opened the pantry door, an avalanche of plastic nearly bowled me over. And you know what? Much like people’s homes have their own distinct smell, people’s Tupperware has its own distinct look. Like the Tupperware that's neatly labeled and appears to be brand new even though it's probably 10 years old? Des. And the container with the garish turquoise lid and flimsy container? Anonymous co-worker.

I got to wondering, as I heard someone yodeling from the mountainous Tupperware pile at my feet, what’s the etiquette here for returning it?

So I Googled it. And here’s one posting I found:

"If someone lends you some Tupperware, usually so you can take some of their food home, you should return the Tupperware cleaned and containing something new, preferably baked goods."

Oh shit, am I in trouble.