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ABOUT ME

About me: I'm 42 and added another gherkin to our pickle party of a family. My husband Chuck, our 9-year-old Junior, our 6-year-old Everett, our toddler and I live in a town in Connecticut I affectionately call Mulletville Lite (aka my childhood hometown). My friends call me Nutjob, and they're right. In my husband's spare time he dresses up as a Viking and chases ghosts (and I'm the nutjob?). When I'm not busy working as a graphic designer, I lie in a ball in the corner.

Monday, January 18, 2010

It's so sweet you almost don't need sugar in your coffee

I have today off from work. While Junior naps, I’m trying to work on my lame presentation.

But oops, here I am blogging instead.

I’ve chosen “Staying on top” as my personal mission. It’s the perfect theme, really. I do want to stay on top—of my workload and projects and co-worker gossip. On the personal side, I want to stay on top of getting in shape, shredding my mail and catching leftovers in the fridge before they grow three layers of mold and fungi and slither up the stairs to eat me in my sleep.

I haven’t chosen my graphic element yet. When I Googled “on top” I was inundated with ideas. Nothing work-related, mind you.

Nothing.

Chuck’s on another job interview. It’s hard to believe he’s been laid off for a year. I don’t come home to as many fortresses these days. As much as Chuck has enjoyed his quality time with Junior, he’s almost ready to trade his sippy cups for travel mugs.

It’s funny how many stay-at-home dads are out there. When Chuck takes Junior to the indoor playground, he sees just as many dads as moms. It’s almost a pickle party, he said. That’s fine with me. I’d rather not think about Chuck chatting up moms and exchanging numbers for playdates while I’m plugging away, giving presentations on, um, you know, staying on top. One of us has to keep our head out of the gutter.

Know what else is funny? Chuck took my brother to the indoor playground last week so Ted could scope out the crowd, now that he’s single. When my brother asked Chuck for a buck for coffee, a woman smiled at them and said, “You two make a nice couple.”

Oh, poetic justice. You can be so very sweet.

21 comments:

tootertotz said...

Kinda funny and strangely incestuous that you were/are dating your brother's ex and now Chuck and your brother are an item!

On the up side of this new development, Chuck is clearly married to the right girl...he is magnetically drawn to your genes...and those of immediate family members.

Small Town Mommy said...

Maybe your brother will get back together with his ex (rather than dating Chuck). After all, Chuck is already taken. Best wishes to Chuck for the job interview. I think staying at home with a toddler is tougher than it sounds. I don't think I could have done it. I am sure your presentation will rock!

kyooty said...

YAY! you're home to blog :P

sarahthings said...

Haha take THAT Ted! :)

Something like this bullriding icon comes to mind for "staying on top"
http://hypnosisinwichita.com/images/PBR_Ride.jpg

Mad Woman said...

Ahahaha!! If anything will drive him back to the ex it'll be comments like that.

Good luck with your presentation.

Pricilla said...

heh heh
Just be sure to stay on top of the submarine...

Jen said...

I was distracted by "staying on top". It's been a while since I was in a cube farm or the corporate world but if the presentations are on how to stay on top it might be a little more fun than I remember.

Frogs in my formula said...

Yes, isn't it weird that I "dated" my brother's ex and now my brother and husband are being mistaken for a couple? It's a new—and gross—interpretation of swinging.

Stacie said...

I'm sure you wish you could have been there when Chuck and your brother were declared a couple. That is WAY too funny!

Mrsbear said...

I'm still giggling at "pickle party". What? Like you're not still in touch with your inner adolescent.

Shana said...

Heh. That is so funny. Poor chuck lol.

Mary said...

Your image should be ...A frog. On top. Of a log!

You could make your frog look like the one in your banner. Only YOU would be holding the sword!

Or you could be a frog on top of a lily pad. And the lily pad could symbolize the fragility and uncertainty of life.

Who said us scientific types can't do imagery? lol.

http://marybt.wordpress.com

Lindy said...

Yeah! and your slogan can be "be the top bunk."

That'll go nicely with your stay on top theme and of course, bring the bedroom humor into it.

Working Mommy said...

I hope you use a good picture for that presentation...loaded with sexual innuendo!! As for the boys trading money for coffee - how cute ;) Sometimes the man talks in his best gay voice just for fun...its great to see the reactions!

~WM

Brandy said...

hahhahhahhaha!

love your staying on top mission statement. that should be fun.

i'm sending chuck good thoughts. I'm not cut out for the stay at home stuff.

Nicole Orriëns said...

Lol!

Choleesa said...

Hilarious!!!!!!

Bird Shit and Baby Caca said...

On top....pickle party......lol! I'm so immature....

SLColman said...

LOL - You two make a nice couple!! OMG too funny!!

Dto3 said...

Pickle, eh? You might tell Chuck to have that checked out.

Denise said...

LMAO... too funny! I promised my husband after my masters degree was finished and I'm back in the working world he could be a stay at home dad. I was rethinking the idea until this post LOL