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ABOUT ME

About me: I'm 42 and added another gherkin to our pickle party of a family. My husband Chuck, our 9-year-old Junior, our 6-year-old Everett, our toddler and I live in a town in Connecticut I affectionately call Mulletville Lite (aka my childhood hometown). My friends call me Nutjob, and they're right. In my husband's spare time he dresses up as a Viking and chases ghosts (and I'm the nutjob?). When I'm not busy working as a graphic designer, I lie in a ball in the corner.

Monday, November 15, 2010

I used to walk to school uphill both ways, and I loved it

I know I'm sinking into that eight-months-pregnant-and-perpetually-grumpy slouch, but every time this commercial for the 2011 Toyota Highlander runs, I find myself yelling obscenities at the television.



According to the moppy-haired brat, he "doesn't tolerate dorkiness very well." He disapproves of his family's car choice (there's poor Dad, washing the Dodge caravan in his white socks and sandals). The boy concludes by saying, "Just because you're a parent doesn't mean you have to be lame."

I hate this kid. I hate every bratty, spoiled, entitled thing about him. At a time when families are losing their homes, unable to pay medical bills, and worrying how they're going to put food on the table, I—as a parent—am supposed to give a shit that my kid doesn't think our family car is cool enough?

When I was a kid, my family's VW wagon had holes in the floorboards. During the winter months my father would wrap his legs in a blanket and hop to get into the car. My mother would hand him a cup of coffee for his drive to work. I remember thinking he looked like a worm, not that he was uncool.

Maybe that snot would worry less about being cool if he spent a week in Haiti, where cholera is claiming lives because people are bathing in and drinking water from street canals. Or maybe he'd like a free trip to Mulletville, where Chuck recently encountered a grown man crying at a Walmart register. The man finally had enough to buy his son a birthday present. The kid's birthday was back in April. The present was a box of LEGOs.

Times are tough. Family and friends are what matter—not that your damn minivan has streaming audio capabilities. That kid should be grateful he has food on his plate. And that he can see. What is he, a fucking sheepdog?

Ok, I'm done. For now.

26 comments:

Mrs. Tuna said...

Times are tough and I'm definetly not cool either.

Lindy said...

Very well put.

Pay it forward - we live by that in my house and I demand it of my kids. They'll thank me one day - at least, they better!

Grace said...

This is the second post I've read that finds that commercial less than wonderful. I wonder if the ad agency knows how much it is rubbing people the wrong way...

VandyJ said...

He just screams to be slapped. My hands start itching every time one comes on TV. What an entitled brat.
OK off my soap box now. The only thing redeeming is that he's not touting a minivan as cool. Those commercials drive me nuts too.

Mama Badger said...

First off, give that kid a god damned hair cut. Secondly, if my kid was too ashamed of my "dorkiness" to ride in my VW station wagon he can walk to what ever trendy spot he's looking to get to. People wonder why kids today are monsters. Hmmm, could it be because everything around them encourages them to be obnoxious in the disguise of "cute". It's like laughing when a little kid swears. Yeah, the first time it's funny, but then the kid says, "God Damn!" in church and it's not so cute.

Catootes said...

Oh THANK GOD! I am not the only one. I hate this kid, and commercial, more than I hate my Nazi Ex-boss from Hell. And that is quite a measurement, let me tell you.

This kid? Sums up everything wrong with the entitlement generation.

Kayleen said...

I LOATHE those commercials... very well put.

KrissBo said...

Amen, Sister! Thank you for putting my thoughts into words!

Bird Shit and Baby Caca said...

I never took notice to the kid until now, but I totally agree with you. What a little brat! LOL

Mommy Cracked said...

I'm giving you a virtual standing ovation! And not just because of the commercial, but because it is so refreshing to see people like yourself that have their priorities straight.

Pricilla said...

I never gave much thought to what my parents drove. That commercial bothered me too

Jenni said...

What in the sam hell is an elementary schooler doing in skinny jeans? Ridiculous.

Daily Dose of Dahl said...

OMG! I hate, hate, hate this commercial too. I've seen two in this series...in the second one, his parents have the stupid 'cool' car and another kid from school is stuck with the dork-mobile that Snotty McSnotterson's dad(?!?) was washing in the first one.

In the first commercial, it especially creeps me out when he's all flirty with the mom thats driving the cool car. And just where is cool mom's kid?!?!? Pissed off because they spent his college tuition on a stupid vehicle.

Phbbtttttt!!!!!!!!!

Texan Mama @ Who Put Me In Charge said...

back away from the blog... I repeat, back away from the blog. Please don't hurt yourself, It's not worth it.

As much as I hate that commercial, I know I'll never buy one of those stupid cars so I'm voting with my wallet. And now I've just voted not to buy a Sienna either.

Lori said...

I guess it pays not to be able to afford a tv?

At least I've got high speed internet...

The Mother said...

What a coincidence! My school was uphill, both ways, too. AND--it snowed! Everyday!

Actually, all I have to do to remind my kids how good they have it is to mention that we didn't have internet.

Frogs in my formula said...

I'm glad I'm not alone. The second commercial sucks as much as the first.

Stacy Uncorked said...

Amen to that! I hate both those commercials. I can't fast forward through them fast enough.

Keely said...

Well, you know it's all his fake parents fault for the way they fake-raised him. If they hadn't taught him to value all things fake, he wouldn't be such a shithead.

Keely said...

Also, check out this comic for a rendering of where you'd have to live in order to have to walk both ways uphill. It could happen.

Daily Dose of Dahl said...

Hi! Just wanted to tell you how much I enjoy your blog!

I got my first blog award today and so now I'm giving you one!

My blog: http://dailydoseofdahl.blogspot.com

SLColman said...

Well said!!

Julie said...

Amen. I want to forward your post directly to the Toyota PR department. They suck.

Lisa @ Boondock Ramblings said...

Love it! American arrogance at it's best! Argh!

Original_Wacky said...

Oh thank you! I am so not alone now, knowing there are others out there who can't stand those commercials. As far a "dorkiness" in vehicles... I'd give ANYTHING to have another chance to ride in my Grandpa's "dorky" vehicle again, just to have one more minute with him.

cristy24 said...

My sentiments exactly!