Showing posts with label is it really only Thursday?. Show all posts
Showing posts with label is it really only Thursday?. Show all posts

Thursday, October 21, 2010

Tampax has a nice ring to it. No?



According to ivilliage, I've graduated from growing corn to cabbage. Soon I will be able to make a salad.

Every time I try to think of more appealing things they could have chosen for comparison I'm stumped.

Size of your baby: Manolo Blahnik pump, size 7?

Size of your baby: Big ass sunflower head?

See? It's hard.

It's also hard trying to nail down a name for kid #2 because every time I imagine a baby boy I picture Junior, and then I find myself choosing Junior's name all over again. Though I am still partial to Diddlydoo. Just for shits and giggles I Googled it. According to Urban Dictionary, it's "a nice word to describe feminine hygiene products."

Knowing this, I can't in good conscience name my cabbage after a tampon. And ew, does "feminine hygiene products" encompass stuff like Vagisil? It just doesn't seem right. So I've decided I am going to wait until I see him to make up my mind. It's kind of refreshing, the idea of waiting. Thanks to modern technology, we know so much before babies are born (gender, what color to paint the nursery) I rather like the idea of a surprise.

And, as an added bonus, it drives family members crazy when you won't list off possible names.

I'm going to bed now. I failed my damn glucose test and have to take the 3-hour version at 7 a.m. tomorrow. Ordinarily I'd feel crappy about that but thanks to women like Trista Sutter from ABC’s The Bachelorette, I now know that skinny, pretty people can get gestational diabetes too.

I mean, yay. Thank gawd she came out and shared her story (like, OMG, how "it’s difficult to see cellulite on your arms when you didn’t have any before!").

So difficult!

But hey, maybe I shouldn't knock her. I considered naming my son after a maxi pad.

I won't let that Halloween go! I won't, I tell you.

After years of dying a slow professional death at Mulletville Corp and then resurrecting my career through a series of part-time, freelance,...