Monday, June 18, 2012

Rub-a-Dub-Dub, mom's head is in the tub

I was kneeling down in front of the tub, giving the two boys a bath. Junior was whining. It seems he is always whining lately. I was on the verge of telling him for the umpteenth time to Knock it OFF! when I dropped the bottle of shampoo into the water.

As I was leaning down, I came face to face with Everett.

I don't know why this particular moment struck me so. I've been face to face with my 18-month-old plenty of times. Like, every five minutes. But something about the angle—about how I was leaning down and he was looming over me—made him appear larger than life.

He'd been trying to "help" me rinse Junior's hair with a cup of water. I'd been trying to explain to Junior that Everett was just trying to help. Couldn't we please just let him try to help?

As I knelt there, looking at this baby monster trying to douse me, Junior and the entire tub, I heard myself. Everett's a baby, Junior. He's learning. We have to be patient. Please don't get mad at him. Please stop whining. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

What planet was I living on? How could anyone not whine under these circumstances? I changed tactics.   

"It sucks having a younger brother sometimes, doesn't it? I mean, look at him. He's relentless. You're sitting here trying to take a bath and minding your own business and he keeps chucking water at you. You must get pretty sick of him. Sometimes even I get sick of him!"

Junior looked at me like I'd just shit the Magic Kingdom.

"You're a good kid," I told him.

And he is. And I should do a better job of remembering how much of a pain in the ass it is to have a younger sibling trounce on your world with all the piss and fire of a mini Godzilla.

I should also try separate baths from now on.

7 comments:

VandyJ said...

Oh, the injustice the older kids have to deal with. This is one that I have to remember with Turbo and Bruiser.

Elizabeth said...

O Wise One, you may have a point about the separate baths. I foolishly never did figure that one out. Mine took baths together until they really couldn't both fit in the tub at the same time and leave room for enough water to get the little darlings clean. May more peaceful bathtimes fill your nights to come.

Patty Woodland said...

As an eldest - it sucks to have siblings until you live too far away from them

Twisted Cinderella said...

what a great realization.

Leanne said...

Showers. I did showers. Faster, cleaner then sitting in dirty water that your sibling peed in and I could do them separately in the same time I could bath two or three together. Just hose them down, soap them up and hose them down again. Use a hand held shower head and it's easy....

Keely said...

Empathy is hard when they're so damn whiny.

Sparkling said...

If you could just shit the magic kingdom, you'd be the queen supreme mother. Everyone would stand in awe.

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