Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Slunk. Where has that word been all my life?

I went on a job interview this week. Even though I'm headed back to work at Mulletville Corp in the next few weeks I thought I'd dust off my suit and see how my interview skills are faring.

They're poor. Yowsers are they poor.

For one, I've lost serious brain cells with kid #2 (see previous post). The only thing I can liken it to is being near-sighted. I know there's a lot going on in the distance, but even with glasses scotch-taped to my face I can't focus on it. I can see every line and cranny immediately in front of me but 100 feet away? Forget about it.

In interview speak, this translates into "We just interviewed someone who appears to have a huffing problem."

The position was Director of New Media. I thought because I tweet (admittedly sporadically) and blog, I rock new media. Hah! The more the interviewer droned on about clouds and tech bubbles and butterscotch.com and http://mashable.com the further I slunk into my chair.

She told me she liked me but that I should spend 2-3 hours a night on new media sites honing my new media skills and then I should come back for a second interview.

Now that's funny. I don't have time to file the rice cereal out of my hair follicles never mind online research.

Never mind absorption of said research.

As I slithered out into the parking lot and collapsed into my car, I realized that I am technologied out. From all of it. Facebook. LinkedIn. Twitter. Google. Google+. Blogger. Texting. IChat. Youtube. ITunes. Twitter parties. RSS feeds. CSS.

Even Pandora. Sweet, free Pandora has given me a techie twitch.

My head feels like it's going to explode and I'm probably not even familiar with half the new media sites out there.

Needless to say, I will not be going back for a second interview. In fact, I'm contemplating buying a crickety shack in Alaska and licking some twigs just to verify that I am in fact still a human being with living, breathing cells and that I can sever my connection to technology and still be ok.

Seriously, are Generation Yers half cyborg?

Are they??

Now, admittedly, the factors contributing to the I-won't-become-assimilated nature of this post are: 1) Chuck found out his grandmother died because of his sister's post on Facebook. Facebook! As a way to see what relatives have clocked out and 2) I had Junior sing a Happy Birthday message to his 5-year-old cousin and his mother—instead of returning the call—posted a note on my Facebook page saying we should cyber chat

so I may have an anti-technology bias this week


am I alone?

Am I?


Pricilla said...

No you are not. Facebook is causing the downfall of polite society. No one calls or writes any longer. They are glued to a stupid "social networking" site. I LOVE those new commercials - I can't remember what they are FOR but I know they ding Facebook something fierce.

AmyBow said...

I am also in the marketing field and also not 19! The good news is, you can't buy experience on the web...right? please tell me that is true!

Mama Badger said...

We are just getting old. That's what I've decided. Just like when our Moms couldn't program the VCR. We're now our Moms.

SmartBear said...

No, you're not alone! I have to draw my limits with it. I only have my blog and facebook (and I really don't mix the two much). I NEED real human interaction. It's all so overwhelming to keep up with. I've even stopped sending birthday cards! I love sending birthday cards! I'm stickin to my guns here....more power to ya sister.

Sparkling said...

Still glad I've never been on facebook. But i do love that I can skype with me sister and my little niece who are 10 hours away. I just don't know about all of the smartphones and the addiction to media. I still have a dumbphone and I might need to keep it that way to keep one foot in reality!!

Jeanne said...

It feels like the world changes faster every day....

Lisa @ Boondock Ramblings said...

You are not alone at all! There is no actual connections to people anymore. we talk without "talking" and that makes people forget there are real people out there. And I'm sick of all the new crap you are supposed to join and know about and ! Argh! I will join you in Alaska, I'll tie the corners of the shack together with vine or something or other..maybe even computer wires from a computer I've gutted!

Lisa @ Boondock Ramblings said...

Oh and please excuse me. I had to cut that comment short so i can go share this on Facebook and cyber chat with my brother. :-)

Keely said...

I am employed in "new media" now and I *still* feel like I'm completely effing lost. The amount of info I have to absorb in a day leaves me feeling like I have to totally unplug, too. I always feel halfway between utter glee at all the tech and utter despair at the disconnection from real life.

Sigh. Get off my lawn.

OGLADI said...

I love the word slunk.

I disconnected from all of it except for blogging and it's been kinda awesome.

Texan Mama @ Who Put Me In Charge said...

OMYGOSH the way your blog post read, I thought you were saying that chuck's grandmother died BECAUSE of a facebook status update.

That I had to read a few times before I understood that he just found out about it through facebook.

Better the latter than the former, I guess.

Matthew said...

You're not alone dude, you have our support... and if you feel like that best you can do is to take xl pharmacy pills and call some friends to have a good time, if u know what I mean.

Man! There are a lot of holes in my neighborhood

Our young neighbors Bob and Claire are wonderful —which is a fricken relief because we basically share a yard. A flat, treeless yard. When ...