Showing posts with label Queen of Spades. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Queen of Spades. Show all posts

Monday, February 9, 2009

I'm not regifting, I'm regenerating love



Lookie, lookie what I found next to the laundry detergent: an unopened box of Chocoholics’ chocolate “tattoo set” given to me by my mother, pre-Junior.*

How it came to reside in the laundry room, I have no clue, but it sure is a stroke of luck. The heat from the dryer has probably kept the jars’ contents from getting cold and crackly, which means I can whisk this gem right into Valentine’s Day 2009 and no one will be the wiser.

Yes! Think of all the post-IKEA fun I can have “tattooing” words on Chuck’s backside. Phrases like “let’s not make another” and “thank God for birth control.”

Or maybe, like the box suggests, I’ll use the “provocative” enclosed stencil sheet to write chocolately instructions on my lover (Chuck, that's you). Instructions like “Let’s go to sleep instead” or “Brush your teeth again, please, we had garlic for dinner!”

I'm kidding. Of course. I don't know how to cook with garlic.

*The woman wanted a grandchild, what can I say? That same year for Christmas, she gave Chuck this:



It also mysteriously ended up in the laundry room...

I won't let that Halloween go! I won't, I tell you.

After years of dying a slow professional death at Mulletville Corp and then resurrecting my career through a series of part-time, freelance,...